By Miles Stiverson
Ever been faced with a wedding comment that was so inappropriate it left you tongue-tied? Among the congratulations and well-wishing, you’re bound to hear a few remarks that are rude, annoying, or flat-out appalling. Be prepared and you’ll leave them sputtering.
“Are you sure you’re ready?”
Translation: Coming from an unmarried acquaintance, this sort of question is likely a projection of their own fears — they’re not in a position to make a lifelong commitment, so it’s hard to imagine that you could be.
Quick comeback: Exude confidence and leave no room for anyone to debate if you or your fiance is in any way unprepared for what you’re getting into: “Absolutely! We are completely in love and ready to be together forever.”
“Is that really the ring you wanted?”
Translation: Almost any engagement ring can elicit a snide remark, whether it’s too big, too small, too sparkly, or not sparkly enough. This sort of nastiness undoubtedly stems from jealously that you’ve been proposed to, and the ring is an object that provides an outlet for them to concentrate all their envious feelings on.
Quick comeback: It’s every newly engaged woman’s right to show off her rock, but if you get negative vibes from someone, draw focus away from the ring with a simple reply like, “We’re both really happy and excited.”
“Who is paying for all this?”
Translation: Maybe they’re surprised by all of the nice details you’ve included in your wedding, or perhaps they’re wondering how your parents could afford to host such a great party on their own dime. Either way, this one ranks near the very top of the bad etiquette list.
Quick comeback: Unless you’re willing to share that info, immediately let the person know they’ve crossed the line: “I’m sorry, but that’s between my fiance and me.”
“How much did that cost?”
Translation: This can be interpreted in a few ways. If the person is planning their own wedding, they’re probably asking out of genuine interest because they like what you’re doing. If, however, there’s no chance they’re planning their nuptials, odds are whatever you tell them will garner an obnoxious response.
Quick comeback: A simple “That’s none of your business” will suffice, or you could throw them off with some dramatics: “It cost me an arm and my fiance a leg — next week we’re going in for surgery together. Romantic, right?”
