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Sex After 40: The Best Time of Your Life

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Tell me something that I don’t know.

I could have saved Top Sante magazine the time, effort, and money it took to put together a recent survey whose results revealed that married women over 40 are having the best sex of their lives.

Sex after the age of 40 is great, at least for married women, says the survey. And it gets better the older your children get.

I’m over 40, divorced, and remarried, with a couple of middle school-aged kids and, yeah, my sex life is the best it’s ever been.

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A few of my theories as to why mine is:

  • I’m with the right person. I think my husband is sexy as hell and I trust him completely. Throw the emotion of love in there and, whew, that’s a powerful combination. Corny but true.
  • Thanks to my custody agreement, I actually get some time alone with my husband. A weekend without kids in the house is almost like a mini-vacation. And everybody knows that vacation sex is the best. Divorce is a tough thing to go through for all involved. And I’m not recommending it. But if you have to go through it, hopefully you get the perk of having your ex take the kids every other weekend.
  • As I’ve gotten older, I’ve become a more sexual person, open to trying new things with my husband such as a few sex toys and a little erotica. As a younger person, I was more conservative and also sexually self-conscious. Experience has done me good.

But I did some informal research and found that I’m not alone in agreeing with the survey results, even among women who have been married to the same person for over 10 years.

More from The Stir: Marriage Gap Closed by Hot Moms

Some more reasons why sex after 40 is so great:

  • You’re more secure with who you are. Experience and age have given you a high level of confidence and self-esteem.
  • You’re not a baby-making machine anymore. You have your body back and you’re happy with it.
  • Your kids are past the age of being physically needy. No waking up in the middle of the night with them, no diaper changes. They still need you but it’s more of a mental and emotional need. Plus they can help out around the house now.
  • You’re happy with your life. You’ve spent the last two decades working, procreating, mothering, and being a spouse. You’ve accomplished a lot and made for yourself the kind of life you wanted.
  • You’ve been practicing having sex for quite some time now. Practice makes perfect.
  • You’re with the right partner. This definitely bears repeating. Without this, you’ve got nothing.