By Ali Swank
We’ve all been there. It’s that painful breakup. It’s the sobbing at 2 a.m., after a yelling match over the phone to end it all. Or, it’s the breakup that didn’t even hurt a little. It’s the moving on; it’s the sunrise that comes months after the end. It’s the realization that you need to focus on yourself, that you pushed away friends, or that your parents were actually right. You didn’t want to learn these relationship lessons, but you did. But, most likely, you’re better off for it.We asked Shine readers to share their relationship lessons they never really wanted to learn:
Men cry – “I’m modern and liberated and I totally dig sensitive guys, but I was once traumatized by a breakup that dissolved into blubbering, wailing, ugly tears. Outside on the sidewalk. In front of The Cheesecake Factory. Oh, and did I mention my eyes were totally dry? Not cool, my friend, not cool.” — Jennifer Prugh Moffitt,
Parents are usually right – “I distinctly remember standing in my parents’ kitchen yelling ‘but I love him,’ as they told me why my high school boyfriend wasn’t right for me. I told them they were wrong, and he was my soul mate. Trying long-distance finally broke us up, but my dad showed me Jeff’s arrest record a couple years later, and I realized my parents were right all along. My mom still calls me every time he gets arrested to rub it in.” — Dayna Davis,
Looks aren’t everything – “I don’t know if it’s because I read so many romance novels when I was younger, but when I met my guy, I melted under the penetrating gaze of his onyx eyes. Once he flashed that toothy grin my way, he had me hooked. I was a writhing heap of feminine hormones gone awry over something as shallow as his perfectly sculpted biceps. Later, I could hardly believe that such a perfect male specimen would want to be with little old… me?! My illusions shattered when I learned more about his personality, or lack thereof. He wasn’t baring into my soul with a penetrating gaze, but rather had been staring at me vacantly.” — Heather Silvey,
