While indulging my craving for french-fried deliciousness; I saw a handsome 40-something man in perfectly pressed grey slacks, button down shirt, and designer leather shoes walk up to the counter. After a brief flirtatious exchange with an extremely attractive and vivacious 20-something behind the register, he ordered his meal. When she called his number he seized the bag with a wink and a smile. I watched him exit through the double doors; nearly 5 feet from his freshly detailed sports coupe, he slowed his stride and began to shake his head. In a single swift motion, he turned and reentered the burger joint. With a determined stride he approached the object of his affection leaned in and whispered in her ear. With a huge schoolgirl grin she grabbed a pen and jotted something on a napkin which she traded for his business card. She quickly placed it into her logo embroidered shirt pocket as he gently folded the napkin and tucked into his leather wallet as he strolled back to his car.
Why do so many women pass up similar golden opportunities because the handsome, confident man before her is wearing a paper hat?
Scenes like this play daily and are prime examples of men seizing an opportunity; super sized Carpe Diem. After spying this innocent exchange between an enamored man and flattered woman I began to wonder: Why do so many women pass up similar golden opportunities because the handsome, confident man before her is wearing a paper hat? Even in extreme circumstances, the Cinderella’s and Pretty Women in our society are still considered date worthy by most men despite the holes in their dresses and dirt on their knees. However the Question of the Day is: Would a woman make advances on a man who isn’t her financial or social equal? Doubtful. But why? Women are more successful than ever; pulling through the great recession, on average, better off than men and when asked what they look for in a mate; money or financial status rarely makes the list.
Does having money make you the perfect date, or can it ruin your love life?
If women don’t ‘need’ men for money or rank earnings high on the list of desirable male assets, then why is it so improbable that a woman of means would ever think of asking or accept a date from a man who is not her financial ‘equal?’
The Paper Hat Debate
When discussing this controversial dating topic with friends and colleagues, I refer to it as the ‘Paper Hat Debate’
I’m willing to use my personal experience presented here as Exhibit A. Several years ago I trudged to the Christmas tree lot in preparation to celebrate my first Christmas post divorce. A handsome young man helped me with my purchase then offered to load the tree onto my truck. After some flirting, he asked for my number. His smile made me swoon and I saw no harm in giving my digits. We chatted on the phone a couple times but it wasn’t until our first date a couple weeks later that he revealed he was actually an EMT/firefighter.