These troublemakers are…
“This means that…”
How many times have you been at a party or any kind of social gathering and felt confused or unsettled? A guy who you thought might be interested, hasn’t made eye contact with you all night! Your mind instantly lands on, “So this means that he’s not attracted to me.” And then, “This means that I’ll never find a date.” And further, “This means that I’ll always be alone.”
You can set off a dangerous downward spiral when you allow “this means that” to take hold.
You tell your best friend about the date you went on a couple of days ago. Things seemed to go well…at least you thought so. But he’s not returned any of your texts since then and the weekend is almost here with no invitation from him to go out again. You’re trying not to bum out your friend, but you’re worried.
You admit to her that you’re sure your date’s silence means that he doesn’t want to see you again. You go on to ask, “Does this mean that there’s something wrong me?!”
Focus on what’s true.
If you have a habit of using these three words that can ruin your happiness (and chance for love), you’re not alone. It’s natural for anyone to want to make sense of a disappointing or frustrating situation, especially one that doesn’t make sense.
