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1. What’s really best for me? If you ignore your gut because it doesn’t agree with your partner, you’re only hurting yourself. “If you let your significant other make too many decisions, then you aren’t expressing your own preferences and desires,” says relationship counselor Carl G. Hindy, Ph.D. “The best relationships involve understanding one another’s needs and wishes, sharing and supporting each other, and helping one another fulfill them. If you don’t speak up, you are short-circuiting the most important piece of your love life.”

 

2. What’s going to make me happy? If you want to go out for girls’ night, go for it. Or if you want greasy Chinese food instead of your usual order of a salad, indulge! It’s okay to do your own thing and let your partner do his. After all, if you don’t make yourself happy first, you won’t be able to fully make your partner happy. As love expert Amy Morin explains, “You need to share your thoughts and ideas, so you can complement one another and help your partner strive to make the best decisions based on the idea that two heads are better than one.” Giving into whatever your partner wants turns you into his pet, and you never see a man dating his dog.

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