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1. He falls asleep during When Harry Met Sally, arguably one of the best rom-coms. What gives? You made it through all of The Rock for him. Twice.

“Most men don’t feel particularly alive during romantic comedies–they’re just not relatable enough to be interesting,” says relationship coach and Your Great Life TV founder Bernardo Mendez. “Although he probably won’t admit it, the little boy inside of him secretly feels like the hero in every action movie. In a romantic comedy, not so much.”

2. He’s been in the bathroom for an hour, and maybe you’re being paranoid, but you’re fairly certain that he’s hanging out in there to avoid you.

Everyone needs the occasional breather after a noisy day–and that downtime may involve sitting on the toilet reading Game of Thrones before he tackles the dishes. That doesn’t mean he’s avoiding you, just that he wants a little escape from thinking in general. Consider this separation a way for you to also get in some me time, whether it be by relaxing with an episode of The Mindy Project or calling your sister. But if your husband’s, er, vacations become a nightly happening, remind him that if he needs some quiet, he can get it on a more comfortable chair out in the open, and you promise not to interrupt with questions or chitchat. Wherever he chooses to decompress, he’ll be able to better engage with you once he’s more relaxed.

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