Are you looking for some signs that he’s phoning it in? No problem. Based on my worldly experience and psychic intuition along with Google’s, here are 8:

1. Weird sounds that are mismatched with his physical demonstration. Think bad porn. Like, really bad porn.

2. He tags you from the back. Dead giveaway if you know him and know what his “orgasm face” looks like. If he’s getting you from behind he’s preventing you from seeing what’s going on.

3. He immediately runs to the bathroom to throw out the condom to prevent you from seeing its lack of fluid components.

4. He deviates from his normal routine by engaging in the muttering of sweet nothings or falls asleep quickly following without a word of thanks. Any deviation from his normal m.o. suggests that something is perhaps out of whack.

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