1. What’s the male version of a spinster?

While everyone was off finding the loves of their lives in their 20s, I was busy dating all the wrong people.

2. Does this mean we can’t hang out and play Xbox anymore?

Replace Xbox with whatever your “immature” hobby is and you’ll catch my drift.

3. I hope the reception is open bar.

Anyone who has a wedding without an open bar should be tried at

4. How do you make single friends when you’re older?

5. I’m running out of excuses about why I’m not married yet.

6. How do you tell your friends you can’t afford all this wedding bullsh*t?

It’s THEIR special day, yet somehow it’s costing YOU an arm and a leg.

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