“I’m just really fortunate to have people [and] friends I can call on at any hour. You don’t get a job, and you immediately want to blame it on, if my hair was different, or maybe if my nose…or they just want to go with light-skin girls, and you start to doubt yourself, and the self-doubts and the low self-esteem starts to creep in. When that happens I know that I can call on a good friend. One day, he made me do this exercise, which I thought was ridiculous at first, standing in the mirror and finding things about my face that I loved, whether it be the freckles or my eyebrows, and just concentrating on all of the positive things…and I thought it was a load…and then, I found myself doing it one day and I found myself feeling a little bit better. So I texted him and I was like, ‘it worked’.” What I found is that it’s great that I have a group of girlfriends that I can rely on, but it can’t just be this one-way street of women validating women.”
Union explained, “There’s something about a platonic, non-sexual male voice in your life, ideally your parent, your father, relative or brother, which should be a steady, consistent source of nothing but positivity. And having this friend inspired me to reach out to my own dad and tell him that he’s got to tell my niece every day that she is a beautiful princess. I can tell her that she has a lovely jump shot, or she does well in school, but what she’s gonna’ start looking out for from other people, from other men, is to tell her how beautiful she is, and she’s gonna’ find validation in all the wrong ways. So, it is important to be that mentor, to be that guiding figure in her life, so she doesn’t accept validation from the wrong places.”
These all may be things “you generally don’t share,” but we’re so glad that she did.
For more articles, click here.
Gabrielle Union: “I Was Never Looked Upon As Being Pretty” was originally published on blackdoctor.org
