Every motherhood journey is unique and new mother Melanie Fiona wants women to know that whatever their experience, there’s no shame in being real about it. The Grammy-winning singer recently released a raw, vulnerable video, “It’s Time To Tell The Truth (uncut),” recounting her birth story that at times was “terrifying” and filled with feelings of shame about what she felt and didn’t feel as a mother.
“I wanted this blog to be called ‘It’s Time to Tell The Truth’ because I feel like there’s not a lot of truth being told amongst women and especially women in the public eye and in the media about what it’s like to have a baby,” Fiona shared at the start of the nearly 22 minute confession.
Just two months ago, Fiona and boyfriend, Jared Cotter, welcomed their son, Cameron Lincoln Cotter, to their lives. Fiona had spent her pregnancy doing what she believed were all the “right” things to prepare for a safe and, if possible, natural birth, but once at the hospital signs of complications surfaced.
“They came in and told me that I was still at 7 centimeters nine hours later. So, they then had to start having the conversation with me about a C-section again and my blood pressure at this point was skyrocketing, almost at like 190 over 110 which is pre-stroke levels. And if you allow preeclampsia to develop it can develop into eclampsia, which causes seizures,” she explained.
“It just came to a point where Jared had to come in one-on-one and look at me, take my hand, look me in the eyes and say, ‘I have to leave the hospital with both of you,’” Fiona tearfully remembers. “Until that moment, I had not recognized how real and severe my situation was.”
Their son was delivered healthy (22 inches, 9 pounds!) by C-section on March 14, but the pain and fear she experienced during delivery would be matched by her postpartum experience that she wasn’t prepared for.
She says she didn’t experience postpartum depression, but she was really trying to make sense of what happened.“It didn’t hit me until I came home from the hospital and I was home with my baby. And I was looking at him and there was almost a moment of numbness where I felt like someone gave him to me and was like, ‘Here, here’s this baby. Take care of it.’ And I was like, ‘Okay, I guess that’s what I’m supposed to do.’ I was disconnected from the whole process because it just happened.”
“I wasn’t prepared to feel that way after having a child and it was really, really difficult. I cried and I’m still crying about it because it’s still taking me time to process who I am now and who I’m becoming. I just think that that’s something that we don’t talk about enough.”
Watch the full video above for her story, lessons learned and encouragement for all of us to live in our truth.
Melanie Fiona’s Emotional Birth Story: “I Felt Like My Body Failed Me” [VIDEO] was originally published on BlackDoctor.org