Blended families can be a beautiful positive thing when everyone is on board for the positivity of it. But what happens when someone was blending without permission, dipped out now wants you to be down with the blend?
A young lady was starting to feel light a broken kitchen appliance after her baby daddy wants all his kids to have a relationship without being a father himself so she reached out to Sam Sylk, radio host and author, and Bijou Star co-host of The Sam Sylk Show with Bijou Star on 93.1 WZAK during the 1:00 pm Reality Hour via a letter in Sam’s Facebook Messages , to find out the rules of becoming a food processor in relationships.
Check out what happened below.
I have a 5 year old daughter who I had when I was only 16 years old. Her father has NEVER been around. He went to jail for 3 years, claimed he was going to be around and try to have a relationship with her when he got out, but of course he’s been out of jail for a year and still has not seen her once. we made plans to meet at the park one day, but he didnt show. I called him, and it went straight to voicemail. I called from another phone and he answered. when he found out it was me, he hung up on me. My Fiance (Who has been a father figure to my daughter since she was 3 years old) told me not to call him anyone. if he wants to see his daughter, then it needs to be up to him to reach out to us. So fine. we have washed our hands clean of him. I’m not really mad because it’s not like my daughter is hurt by this. she doesnt know this man. she has never known him. my fiance has been in her life consistently and she calls him daddy. so in my eyes, she’s good. we’re a family and we’re about to welcome a new addition in July. the only problem now is…. her real father has 2 other children with 2 other women. they keep reaching out to me, trying to schedule play dates with my child. I’m not necessarily against her spending time with them, I just don’t think it’s that important. I know that sounds bad, but it would be different if my daughter knew she had siblings and actually WANTED to see them. but she doesn’t. she has no clue who they are. and why would she?? she doesn’t even know her biological father let alone his other kids. How do I tell them that since we no longer want anything to do with this man, that unfortunately means that we don’t want anything to do with his kids either? Once she gets older, and we decide to explain to her the situation of her paternity, then it can be up to her to pursue a relationship. But right now, her spending time with these children is not a priority to me. I’m working full time, going to Dental School full time while pregnant, and I don’t really have time for anything extra. He doesn’t even take care of the other two children either. so its like… why do they need to see each other?? Yes they’re technically siblings, but they don’t even know the man that connects them all. any advice?