CLOSE

Wedding season is gearing up and the excitement of a fresh, new marital adventure is tempered by a host of pre-wedding issues. I have had the pleasure of coaching several newly engaged couples who came to seek advice on the best way to be prepared before they walk down the aisle. They realized that the success and failure of their relationship depended upon how well they dealt with the major issues. As we went through the list of pertinent questions, I wanted to share them with you. So to help you get a jump start on paving a healthy path to marriage, here are the questions you need to address before walking down the aisle:

Why are we getting married?

You want to be clear as to why you are choosing to get married. If you find that your reasons are pregnancy, financial security, loneliness or wanting to get out of your parents house, then you need to step back and reassess your choices, because these are not valid reasons to get married.

Kids

If you and your partner cannot agree on whether to have children, then you are setting your marriage up for failure. You must be on the same page as to whether you want them and work out how you want to raise them.

Do you want to have kids? How many?

How long should we be married before having children?

What kind of parent will we be?

How do you feel about adoption?

What is our parenting philosophy?

Will one of us stay home after we have children, or will we have a nanny?

Money

Handling your finances as a couple is part of developing a healthy foundation for marriage.

Are you a saver or spender when it comes to money?

Should we have a budget?

Should we have a joint checking account or separate accounts or both?

Who is responsible for making sure that bills are paid on time?

How much should we save for vacations?

How much do we owe in debts and what are our assets?

Where does our money go?

What are our financial goals?

Expectations

Creating mutual goals and vocalizing expectations will help you stay on the same page through out your marriage.

What expectations do we have for the future?

Where do we see each other in 5/10/20 years?

Read More