Love Analytix: The Female Dictionary Part 2

By Shirea L. Carroll on Jan 10th 2011 9:00AM

Filed under: Dating, Relationships, Love Analytix

The language of woman can be so complicated that we doubled back to help those who need even further assistance. It’s baffling for a man to hear a woman say ‘yes’ and mean ‘no,’ or say ‘no’ but really mean ‘yes.’ So in an attempt to crack the code, here is a simple guide to understanding the language of women, or what we like to call the Female Dictionary Part 2. In case you missed Part 1, click here.

‘I’m A Free Spirit’

Usually used as code when a woman wants to discreetly express her sexuality. Meaning she’s really promiscuous and proud of it. Free spirit sounds much better than hoe any day.

Ex: Yes I saw James in the morning and Mike that same night, but you know I’m a free spirit.

‘Of Course I Miss You’

If a woman gives this response after being questioned as to whether or not she missed a man, trust – she really didn’t. If a woman missed a guy she would tell him without having to be asked. Sadly, this statement really means she didn’t want to hurt your feelings.

‘He’s Not Right For Me’

Excuse used by women when they are trying to decide whether or not they should date someone. Usually said after seeing the person for a significant amount of time, and what it really means is that she likes you but is trying not to.

Ex.: I like him a lot, but he has three baby mothers. He’s just not right for me.

‘When Are We Hanging Out?’

Woman are socialized to be chased, not to pursue. If she becomes impatiently inquisitive about when you two will be in each others presence, she’s really asking when are we having sex?

Synonyms: When are you coming over; I haven’t seen you in forever; I don’t have any plans tonight

‘I Like Older Guys’

Whether a woman is 24 or 37, if she turns you down because she says she likes older men, she’s telling you’re not established or rich enough to deal with her. Keep it moving.

‘Who Is She?’

Woman want to know in detail about all women in your life, including your mother. However, most men fail to realize that when this question is asked, what it really means is that she’s already done her due diligence and knows everything about the woman in question, and therefore wants to see if you will lie.

Ex: I saw that a Tiffany is your Facebook friend now; who is she?

‘You Make The Plans’

If you are dating a woman and she puts the pressure on you to plan the date, she is pleading for you to step up your game. What she’s really asking you to do is finally impress her.

Ex: I picked the restaurant the last two times. Tonight, you make the plans.

‘You So Nasty’

Usually flirtatiously said to a man in a sexual context. When used, she really means she likes what you are doing and doesn’t want you to stop. Do not let this confuse you when you actually do something gross, like fart or burp.

Synonyms: Stoooooop

‘I Have A Yeast Infection’

Made popular when used in an episode of the hit show ‘Girlfriends,’ this phrase is said when a woman can’t think of any other excuse as to why she doesn’t want to to have sex with you at that particular time. Last resort.

‘How Do I Look?’

A humble way of a woman trying to figure out why she took five hours to get ready and you still haven’t complimented her. She is fishing for a compliment and really is asking, “why haven’t you noticed how good I look yet?”

Synonyms: Do you like my hair/outfit/nails/perfume?

‘I Have Nothing To Wear’

Your woman probably has way more clothes than you do, so if a woman says she has nothing to wear especially after an invitation from a man to go out, it’s a subtle request to go shopping in attempts not to look like a gold digger.

Ex: Wow, how nice of you to invite me that concert! Too bad I have nothing to wear.

‘It’s Complicated’

Usually when a single woman tells a man she’s is free to date but that her situation is complicated, what she’s trying to say is she’s still in love with an old flame. Single is single, involved is involved, and there is no gray area unless a woman hasn’t let go of her ex.

Synonyms: I have a lot on my plate; I’m trying to see what the future brings

Ladies, what phrases would you like to add to the Female Dictionary? Guys: does your woman tell you things you don’t understand? Tell us!