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It may be uncomfortable to broach the subject, but talking about money with your partner is extremely important for a healthy relationship. Even if you keep your finances separate, your partner’s money habits will inevitably affect you in some way. If you’re having trouble bringing up the subject, try using these questions to get the conversation started:

1. Is saving money important to you?

This question encompasses a few others, such as “Have you started saving for retirement?” and “Do you have an emergency fund?” The answer will offer a lot of insight about your partner’s money personality. If saving is important, does she make it a priority to put a set amount away each month or paycheck? Perhaps she puts away only the money that comes in above a set income — income from a part-time job or freelance work, reimbursement checks, tax refunds or bonuses, for example.

Does your partner put away a lot of money but routinely take it back out to pay for fun purchases? Does she put away less than you but then refuse to touch it? What level of saving is considered appropriate? Your numbers and habits could vary wildly from your partner’s.

2. If someone gave you $1,000, what would you do with it?

There’s nothing wrong if the response is “Spend it!” Take the time, however, to get a more-detailed answer. Would he spend it on paying down his student loans? That’s a very different picture than “I’d buy lottery tickets with it instead of using it to pay rent.” Your partner may be thousands of dollars in debt, but choosing to put the extra money toward reducing debt shows how serious he is about getting back in the black.

3. Do you want kids?

Here’s a sensitive question that isn’t for a first (or even 10th) date. But if you are at that point in your relationship, the decision on having children will have a huge impact on your finances. According to BabyCenter, the cost of raising a child born in 2009 can be as much as $310,000, depending on a range of factors.

4. How do you feel about debt?

Debt is something most of us will deal with in our lifetime. It can be a great tool for starting and expanding a business, getting an education or building net worth through real estate. But does having debt stress out your partner? Does she prioritize getting out of debt when she incurs it? Does she consider debt a tool to be used only when appropriate? If your partner doesn’t think having debt is a big deal, she may not hesitate to put an expensive laptop on the credit card without a plan to pay for it. Or she might be financially responsible, but laid back about it. Ask for a more detailed explanation if you aren’t sure how to read the response.

5. What is your current financial situation?

Are you carrying $10k in consumer debt? Do you have student loans? Do you have money stocked away for emergencies? This question gives you and your partner the opportunity to take stock of where you are with your finances. Consider retirement savings, other savings, consumer debt, student loans, investments and any other assets. The conversation doesn’t have to sound like you’re calculating his net worth — exact numbers aren’t really as important as knowing where his priorities are when it comes to money.

6. How many accounts do you have, and where are they?

In the unfortunate event that something happens to your partner, you need to know where her assets are. What credit cards will need to be closed? What retirement accounts will need to be dealt with? What bills will come due and when? Putting all of your financial information in a place where your partner can access it if the need arises could save a lot of hassle later on.

The bottom line

Be honest with your responses and you may find financial areas where you agree on goals for improvement. Don’t just give the answer you think is “right.” It’s more valuable to have a realistic view of your and your partner’s financial habits. Don’t think you have to end the relationship if your answers don’t match. Many couples have one partner who is more conservative with cash, while the other is more lax about where and how he spends his paycheck. Knowing where you and your partner stand will help you keep yourselves in line financially, and that will make your relationship that much stronger.

And if you aren’t part of a couple, these questions are just as important to ask yourself.

Source: MSN

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