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You hear so much about what’s acceptable to deal with in a relationship with a man, but sometimes a woman needs that same wake up call when it comes to her relationship with her friends. As in most relationships, people get comfortable and start treating people any old way, and when they do, you have to do something about it. But what’s tolerable and what things are you overreacting about? The situations discussed in this post could warrant the dismissal of a friendship, but they can also foster a good conversation that could help it improve and grow.                                                                      People Forcefully Putting You in Their Drama

There’s a difference between someone wanting your opinion on the drama in their lives, and them actually putting you in it. Whether you’re caught in the mix of some he said/she said because your “bestie” decided to tell her boyfriend YOU were the one who saw him getting a bit too friendly with chicks at the gym, or if it’s you caught in between two of your friends, that’s not right. As if you don’t have enough of your own drama, a friend who brings you a lot of confusion is someone who might not need to be a part of your life anymore.

Dating an Ex-Boyfriend of Yours

It’s true: you don’t actually own anybody, and staking claim in human beings went out of style hundreds of years ago. However, if a good friend of yours wants to all of a sudden find love in a hopeless place with the fella that you once laid down with, shared secrets with and possibly were in love with at one time, that’s a little bogus. I know there might be a shortage of successful studs in their mind, but why go for the fish in the sea so close to home? I only say this in the case of a very good friend and not a random associate just because, if you were never really close with that person, that’s different. But as for your girl going for your old guy, it just comes off suspicious. You never know if these out-of-the-blue genuine feelings may have grown while you and your ex were still together…paranoia time! You all might need to have a deep talk about that one.

Not Being a Team Player

A main factor in being a good friend is being there when people need you. However, an even better friend (not just the bare minimum homie) is one who makes an effort to be around in general to hang out. You have all these ideas of great bars for you all to check out, poetry events to kick it at, movies to see, but everytime you bring them up she’s not feeling it. Not because she can’t afford to come along, or because she always has other plans, but because she just doesn’t have an interest in compromising or doesn’t feel like it–consistently.

No Friend Zone: Three Things You Shouldn’t Tolerate From Your Girlfriends  was originally published on