Follow me on twitter: By @MattMyers_OnAir
Remember watching TV back in the day and seeing “The Cosby Show”? Didn’t you think to yourself “Wow, I want a family just like that?’ Or how about classic African American love stories like “Love Jones” & “Love & Basketball”, I remember saying to myself “If I could find a woman down for me like that, I would be set!” Brothers starting stepping up their poetry game, cranked “The Mis-Education of Lauryn Hill” to the max, & romanced women like their name was D’angelo (circa 96 not the current one).
Well those days are long gone, meet the new examples of relationships….. The Basketball Wives and Housewives of Atlanta and women like them. Without the positive examples of black love prominent on TV and Film like the late 80’s and throughout the 90’s we and more importantly our children are left with the images of how Royce or Evelyn get a man and it sure isn’t through romance! As a single man I personally see how some in this younger generation of women approach dating and from what I see love/romance is wayyyyyyy down the list of priorities. First is “who” you are, because god forbid she is seen in public with you and no one knows who you are, Second is how much you make, and a close third is what can YOU do for her. After all of those questions are answered then maybe you can talk about building a relationship. They want to live like the Basketball Wives, they want to go into every club and sit in VIP, they want to take pictures with Stars and put them on their Facebook page so everyone can see how glamorous they are (in their on mind). When women stop expecting romance then as men we adapt to what you want. So please don’t be mad at the fellas when you aren’t treated with the proper respect you deserve, because that’s not what certain women want now. I can almost guarantee you that if a man gave a dozen roses to 10 women between 20-35 eight out of the 10 would think he was soft. They’d take a red carpet over red roses any day. Blame it on the “I want it all and I don’t want to work hard to get it” attitude that’s prominent on reality TV and in some current songs (i.e. “Sponsor” by Teirra Marie).
A strong relationship is always 50/50. It’s never about what the other person can do for you, it’s about what can you do to add to EACH OTHER. Ladies if you want to go back to the days of “Love Jones” then first examine yourself and what type of man you are going after. Men will always do whatever it takes to attract a woman, so if you decide that you want a man who reads 20 books a day, please believe every brother in America would go get a library card! Just take a second and think about it, because it is real out here.
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