Fair Fight Guidelines
If you feel a fight is unavoidable, you can still find a win-win resolution if you follow these guidelines.
• Remember the point of the fight is to reach a solution, not to win, be right, or make your partner wrong.
• Don’t try to mind read. Ask instead what he or she is thinking.
• Don’t bring up all the prior problems that relate to this one. Leave the past in the past; keep this about one recent problem. Solve one thing at a time.
• Keep the process simple. State the problem, suggest some alternatives, and choose a solution together.
• Don’t talk too much at once. Keep your statements to two or three sentences. Your partner will not be able to grasp more than that.
• Give your partner a chance to respond and to suggest options.