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In the interest of not getting too down by this sad news, we looked back on their most lovey-dovey moments-and realized why we’re in major denial:

1. They survived Miley-gate. After Miley Cyrus’ twerk heard ’round the world at the VMAs in August, people were abuzz about her highly sexual performance. She bumped and grinded all over Patton’s husband, and yet the actress was remarkably cool. “It doesn’t affect me anymore at all,” she told E! News Today about the interaction between her husband and the pop singer. “Quite frankly, all my friends dance like that with him,” she added. “He’s like the guy that you can dance with, ’cause he’s safe!” If she could laugh that off, we figured they could work through anything!

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