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1. You’re super sick of being single. Been there, done that, considered dating—and did date—a less than desirable dude. Whether you’re still stinging from your last breakup or you’ve been single so long you’re not sure if sex is still in style, it can be really tempting to take the first guy who isn’t all that bad, rather than holding out for the best life will bring you. The danger in not waiting for someone who really makes your engine rev is that you can start to believe that he’s the best you can get. You owe it to yourself to prove you deserve an amazing, not just OK, man. (This isn’t to say you can’t date an A-OK guy—just save the commitment for someone who doesn’t make you feel like you’re settling.)

2. Because you’ve stopped believing in true love. I don’t believe in soulmates, but I also do believe in true love—because true love is what happens when the honeymoon phase is over and you still work, every day, to make your relationship awesome and your significant other’s life better. When bad relationships have beaten you down, it can be all-too-easy to believe that something subpar is as good as it gets. It’s not. I promise. You may never have a movie-like romance story to tell, but you can find true love—that special love that sustains through fights and tough times and loss, plus all the good, of course.

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