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texting-2013-getty-sam-edwards1. Not having enough hair. Are we losing our hair? Can we grow a beard? We need to look like Robin Williams at the start of Jumanjior we are not a man.

2. Having a lame “how we met” story. You’re never going to have a meet cute like they do in the movies. Unfortunately, there’s no way to spin “we were drunk at a frat party” into something anywhere as good as Jack saving Rose’s life, let alone Adam Sandler and Drew Barrymore meeting next to a dumpster in The Wedding Singer.That’s way too much pressure.

3. Being short on money. Blame the whole hunter/gatherer society aspect, but men still feel like they need to be able to provide for our family. Unless we’re making Soulja Boy-buying-a-plane level money, we’re always going to feel like we can do more.

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