1. You Flaunt Your Holiday Haul
You know that couple that loves to shower each other with extravagant presents? Diamond bracelets, Rolex watches, bow-wrapped BMWs, luxury cruises-nothing says holiday love to them like a maxed-out credit card. Well, nine times out of ten that couple also delights in rubbing their glitzy gifts in other people’s faces: “Just LOOOOK at this rock that Ken gave me!” (Um, do we really have to?)
2. Cheer! Cheer! Cheer! You’re Cheer-Gushers
“You simply MUST help us decorate the tree!!!!!” (on November 3rd). “Merry Christmas!!!!!!” (on December 10th). “Has Santa been good to you this year?!!?” (to a 25-year-old). Look, not to be a Grinch, but can we all agree to just take it down a notch?
3. You’re Holiday Party PDAers
This tradition is as old as Santa Claus and Rudolph combined: every year at holiday parties across the country you’re bound to find some couple tonguing each other by the fireplace, groping by the gifts, and making all the little elves nearby blush. Remember: Mistletoe is for kissing, not for mauling.